Healing vs. Curing

September 16, 2012 Sunday

Some twenty five years ago a young woman was referred to me because she was “depressed.” That was the reason given by the referring physician. She also had an inoperable malignant brain tumor. This young lady had just gotten married and was starting a new chapter in her life. As I worked with her I witnessed such grace and dignity as she faced one challenge after another. She eventually came to accept the inevitable and had a transcendent peace within her. Her husband however, never was able to accept her inevitable death. As you may imagine his world of hopes and dreams were shattered by her diagnosis and prognosis. After science failed her he wanted to try everything possible. With each new rumor of a miracle cure he latched onto it and wanted her to try it. She was calm and resigned, he wasn’t. Much like him, I did not want to admit that death was inevitable even though in my heart I knew it to be so. I was seeing death as failure. That perception kept me from being present. Her husband’s grief and anxiety kept him from being present. In the end, I think we both failed her. 

I have come from that time to understand that being present is very much part of the healing process. Life is sacred and most people do not want to die, but death comes to us all and we have not failed because we die. Failure may be that while alive we really never lived.

This young woman and many since have taught me that when one finds a chosen purpose and meaning for life and is in alignment with the soul’s purpose, one has a transcendent joy. Healing truly transcends curing.

Our mortality brings us face to face with our own vulnerability. As we accept our vulnerability we are able to love more, see more, and be more present for self and others. Vulnerability allows us to love without condition and to accept love as it is given. I believe as we surrender we allow the angels to support us through every experience of mortality.