We are living in a world that is changing so rapidly that one cannot possibly keep up, especially as it relates to technology. Recently my granddaughter wrote an essay on the attachment to texting. She made the argument that while staying in touch in important, the price we pay may be very high. This is especially true as it relates to many things that cannot be recaptured like the sight of a “bald eagle” in flight.
The world is designed by the intelligence of nature to evolve. I believe we as a species are designed by the intelligence of nature to grow and evolve spiritually. I think of spirituality in terms of relationships; it is our connection to all things. These connections can be healthy – that is, it benefits both entities; or they can be unhealthy in that one or both are diminished by the relationship. At the spiritual level, if one party in the relationship is hurt, both will be diminished. At the temporal or ego level of relationship (this is where most relationships function), they are competitive, striving to gain the advantage and be declared the winner. Ultimately winners become losers and the cycle continues.
The upside of technology is that we on the planet are instantly connected to all people and events that happen, and it has become more difficult to pretend that what is happening does not impact us, therefore absolving us of accountability.
In social psych literature, there is a concept of “diffusion of responsibility.” This phenomenon exists when people are able to excuse their lack of involvement by rationalizing that someone else will take care of it.
Personal accountability for our lives is the key to empowerment. While we cannot always dictate or determine what happens to us, we can always choose the meaning we put on any given experience. This often requires us to overcome our cultural and ego programming. This task is difficult and often painful, especially to the ego personality. It seems egos love to be offended and outraged by unfairness and injustice, sometimes to the extent that inflicts extreme violence on the offender.
I have found this to be true with many of my clients who have made mistakes, betrayed themselves, or have not lived up to their perfectionistic ideals. In the name of integrity they continue to psychologically and spiritually punish themselves with self-defeating thoughts and behaviors. They have sometimes subconsciously, and many times consciously, concluded that “I am unacceptable and therefore in need of punishment.” These people are very good people in that their personal character qualities are by nature very adequate. Oftentimes they are very sensitive and compassionate with others; they wouldn’t intentionally hurt someone, they are honest, they work hard and often make wonderful contributions to others. However, they withhold empathy and compassion from themselves. This withholding of love violates the laws of nature that allow us to evolve spiritually. Literally, it keeps us stuck.
A wonderful quote by Carl Jung puts the problem in clear perspective. He said, “What if I should discover that the poorest of the beggars and the most impudent of offenders are all within me, that I stand in need of the alms of my own kindness, that I am the enemy who must be loved. What then?”
The “what then” is this perspective that allows a higher consciousness to operate. The ego has been subdued and continued spiritual growth now becomes possible. We come to a very powerful psychological “YES” that allows us to change. The psychological and spiritual equivalent of “no” keeps us stagnant and spiritually impotent, thus thwarting the laws of personal progression.
No one changes by “hating” themselves, no one heals the relationship with self by hating self. Take stock of yourself, look at those personal character qualities that serve you and those which are sabotaging yourself. Do an honest inventory. Make small changes that reflect the spiritual “yes” to something more peaceful and harmonious in all your relationships.
I started this discussion by looking at the benefits and the pitfalls of modern technology. My great fear is not that machines will become more human-like; my great fear is that our brains evolve to become more machine-like, thus losing our ability to connect at the deepest level. I doubt very much that we can ever program an inanimate object to love and to have compassion and empathy for another. Would a machine ever intentionally give its life for another?
When we become so enamored with technology, we literally are giving our humanity to a machine which can never bring fulfillment. It becomes the illusion of having intimacy. It can be terribly stimulating and hold our attention for hours, and when not connected can make us feel anxious and agitated, very much like withdrawal from an addictive substance.
True intimacy with self and others brings a sense of fulfillment and peace. There is a transcendent quality in this state of awareness, very difficult to define and describe, but all know it when we experience it.
I believe that we as a species long for that transcendent peace; we are hard-wired for it. We are coming to understand that the competitive paradigm of life does not serve humanity as well as other life on the planet. The cooperative spirit is more in alignment with our true nature than winning at all costs. This competitive paradigm which is ego-driven ultimately serves no one, even the winners.
