Making Sense

How does one make sense out of a senseless act as in the recent acts of violence in our country? We are shocked that it is happening in “our neighborhood”. In real time that violence is occurring in neighborhoods all around the globe. We must broaden our view of the world we live in. In recent times past the majority of the populace did not have intimate access to the information of events of the world. Today there is almost instant access with live images of carnage and destruction. It is becoming much more difficult for people to remain indifferent and uninvolved. 

The level of healing involvement will be different for every individual. The foundational healing level is healing the relationship with self. Healing requires that we find harmony with the different elements of ourselves. I use the word harmony because I don’t believe we are ever in true balance. Nature is dynamic, it is constantly moving. Air or water that are not moving become stagnant and without life. This constant movement allows us to evolve and grow. Like nature, if we are not growing and evolving emotionally and spiritually, we suffer serious consequence.

Eckhart Tolle made the statement that, “When the inside is okay, the outside will take care of itself.” I made a comment in the last blog post that I believe no one heals by hating him or herself. And no one heals by hating and resenting anyone else. This hatred and resentment creates an illusion of separateness between entities. Some use this illusion of separateness as justification for violence. Healing occurs when we can reconcile all the conflicting parts that are within us and between us. Carl Jung was to have said, “What if I should discover that the poorest of the beggars and the most impudent of offenders are all within me. That I myself stand in need of the alms of my own kindness, that I myself am the enemy who must be loved? What then?" As we are able to love ourselves, it provides a foundation for loving others.

If we honestly examine ourselves we must admit that as a human being we are all capable of the most inhuman acts; that as human beings we are complex and are capable of a broad range of emotions that require examination. Examining what really defines us, and what qualities of our personal character we truly possess, require courage and perseverance. All of us at some time define ourselves in terms of what we think others think of us. Most of us simply adopt beliefs and attitudes of our culture rather than choosing attitudes and beliefs that contribute to our personal growth, as well as the growth of the culture.  As we risk taking the journey inward and finding the truth of whom we really are, which really is no risk at all, because when you get there and find the real or authentic self, it is sweetness beyond description. I have never experienced someone who was disappointed in that person. I have experienced many who on the way there, found parts of themselves that were most disturbing and in need of attention. As they gave those undesirable parts attention by understanding their original purpose, those wounds became gifts of wisdom and understanding. I often have people examine original wounds, not for the purpose of reliving them or being defined by them, but to find the gift of the wound. As in nature when there is a wound there is a gift. Ego function defines us in terms of the wound; spiritual function defines us in terms of the gift. When we accomplish this shift in consciousness, we live in gratitude. We have created harmony within mind, body and spirit. We have experienced the healing process. We find meaning and purpose in the journey of life.

A Call To "Wake Up" ~ Boston Marathon Bombs

Another reckless event in the life of our country. Another senseless event that reminds us how vulnerable we are. I first felt outrage as I viewed the images coming from the television, then my feelings turned to empathy and compassion for those injured. In the mix was my admiration of those very courageous men and women who ran into the middle to aid those who were hurt and in shock.

This event reminds us how much we are connected on this small planet and all are in need of healing our relationships. It reminds us of the terrible consequences that come from not embarking on the healing journey. In the name of some cause there are people who in their insanity, are willing to destroy innocent people. They have egos that are so attached to an idea or perspective that it justifies wanton destruction of life. It is not just the destruction of those that may disagree with them, it is directed at the most innocent and vulnerable. This process of attaching one’s ego to a cause is evil. There are a few ideas and causes worth dying for. There are even fewer ideas and causes worth killing for. Ego function is solely for the desires and perceptions of the one who holds such perception. It rarely serves the good of humanity. It is evil because it is touted as being for a greater good but really has no such intent. Those acts of insanity are for the sole purpose of satisfying the ego of the individual.

Sadly, this process can happen at all levels of humanity, from the level of personal relationships to the level of international and political relationships. I see many intimate relationships injured because one or both have their identities so tied up in being right. The thought of being able to see the others’ point of view is beyond the capacity of ego. The cliché of “would you rather be right or happy?” so aptly applies. Most would certainly rather be right than have a relationship. So many people fail to recognize that to seek understanding of another’s point of view can bring peace and happiness. When we bring pure awareness to ego function, the ego disappears. It is much like bringing light to shadow. Darkness and light cannot exist in the same vessel.

Some two-thousand years ago Christ encouraged people to develop the ability to “turn the other cheek”. This great metaphor is literally teaching us the healing function of seeing a different side of any perspective or idea. Everyone consciously knows this but so few practice it. When practiced, it works, whether in our relationship with ourselves, or with others.

Of all relationships, the relationship with self is the most important. A relationship with self that is built on the foundation of shame and self-deprecation can never stand. This relationship is defined by what others think of us – in reality what we think they think. This is always ego function and puts us at the mercy of our external world. There is no doubt that context so deeply affects us and while it affects us it need not define us. We as a species have the ability to examine ourselves and to come to understand those parts of us that may not serve our higher good. In many years of practice I have never encountered a situation where a person healed by hurting themselves. They have never healed a relationship by finding fault or hating the other (or self). Conflict has never ended conflict and never will, yet it is the way of ego function. The terrible irony is that most people define themselves in terms of ego function, that is, they define themselves in terms of things they believe they can possess or have to defend. These possessions will all be taken away from us at some point in time. Again, a long time ago we were encouraged to collect “treasures” that are not corruptible by  “moth and rust”.
The most desirous of all possessions are those we cultivate: empathy, compassion, integrity, and understanding. We can give them away but they can never be taken from us.

My hope is that we, as individuals and as a country, do not let the violence of terrorism define us. I hope what defines us is our response to it.

I witnessed the many women and men rush to aid those injured. The showing of care and concern touches all of us deeply. I wish it didn’t take a tragic senseless event to wake us up to our highest human potential. Being awake requires a daily practice.

Some years ago I read an article from the Washington Post about a famous violinist who incognito played a most valuable violin in a Metro station in Washington DC. He played for 45 minutes – no one stopped to hear and to listen. We are all guilty of living our lives mindlessly – so caught up in the trance of normalcy that it often takes a “bomb” to wake us up. This need not be the case. When someone asked the Buddha who he was, he replied, “I am awake”.