Another reckless event in the life of our country. Another senseless event that reminds us how vulnerable we are. I first felt outrage as I viewed the images coming from the television, then my feelings turned to empathy and compassion for those injured. In the mix was my admiration of those very courageous men and women who ran into the middle to aid those who were hurt and in shock.
This event reminds us how much we are connected on this small planet and all are in need of healing our relationships. It reminds us of the terrible consequences that come from not embarking on the healing journey. In the name of some cause there are people who in their insanity, are willing to destroy innocent people. They have egos that are so attached to an idea or perspective that it justifies wanton destruction of life. It is not just the destruction of those that may disagree with them, it is directed at the most innocent and vulnerable. This process of attaching one’s ego to a cause is evil. There are a few ideas and causes worth dying for. There are even fewer ideas and causes worth killing for. Ego function is solely for the desires and perceptions of the one who holds such perception. It rarely serves the good of humanity. It is evil because it is touted as being for a greater good but really has no such intent. Those acts of insanity are for the sole purpose of satisfying the ego of the individual.
Sadly, this process can happen at all levels of humanity, from the level of personal relationships to the level of international and political relationships. I see many intimate relationships injured because one or both have their identities so tied up in being right. The thought of being able to see the others’ point of view is beyond the capacity of ego. The cliché of “would you rather be right or happy?” so aptly applies. Most would certainly rather be right than have a relationship. So many people fail to recognize that to seek understanding of another’s point of view can bring peace and happiness. When we bring pure awareness to ego function, the ego disappears. It is much like bringing light to shadow. Darkness and light cannot exist in the same vessel.
Some two-thousand years ago Christ encouraged people to develop the ability to “turn the other cheek”. This great metaphor is literally teaching us the healing function of seeing a different side of any perspective or idea. Everyone consciously knows this but so few practice it. When practiced, it works, whether in our relationship with ourselves, or with others.
Of all relationships, the relationship with self is the most important. A relationship with self that is built on the foundation of shame and self-deprecation can never stand. This relationship is defined by what others think of us – in reality what we think they think. This is always ego function and puts us at the mercy of our external world. There is no doubt that context so deeply affects us and while it affects us it need not define us. We as a species have the ability to examine ourselves and to come to understand those parts of us that may not serve our higher good. In many years of practice I have never encountered a situation where a person healed by hurting themselves. They have never healed a relationship by finding fault or hating the other (or self). Conflict has never ended conflict and never will, yet it is the way of ego function. The terrible irony is that most people define themselves in terms of ego function, that is, they define themselves in terms of things they believe they can possess or have to defend. These possessions will all be taken away from us at some point in time. Again, a long time ago we were encouraged to collect “treasures” that are not corruptible by “moth and rust”.
The most desirous of all possessions are those we cultivate: empathy, compassion, integrity, and understanding. We can give them away but they can never be taken from us.
My hope is that we, as individuals and as a country, do not let the violence of terrorism define us. I hope what defines us is our response to it.
I witnessed the many women and men rush to aid those injured. The showing of care and concern touches all of us deeply. I wish it didn’t take a tragic senseless event to wake us up to our highest human potential. Being awake requires a daily practice.
Some years ago I read an article from the Washington Post about a famous violinist who incognito played a most valuable violin in a Metro station in Washington DC. He played for 45 minutes – no one stopped to hear and to listen. We are all guilty of living our lives mindlessly – so caught up in the trance of normalcy that it often takes a “bomb” to wake us up. This need not be the case. When someone asked the Buddha who he was, he replied, “I am awake”.
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