Healing, Harmony & Relationships

Healing is defined as finding the “harmony within self, between others and harmony with the earth”. When we are in harmony we find peace within. Harmony is difficult to keep because the relationships of our lives are dynamic. That is they are always in motion. There is no life in things that are stagnate. 

The reason to leave relationships is so that one can go on growing emotionally, psychologically and spiritually. Relationships that have a pattern of invalidation probably should be left. Even enlightened people who are living in a toxic environment with no change, will suffer the effects of the toxicity. Having the courage to say I am valuable and I deserve to be valued is an amazing gift. 

Relationships are the only place that gives us opportunity to heal, whether it be with self, others or our Higher Power or God. Disharmony creates pain and illness. While change is painful, it is also necessary because it is the truth of the universe. Anything that doesn’t change has no vitality.

The wounds originally came from being separated from our source of nurturance and love. It comes because we have to grow and not being separated originally (birth process) would have destroyed us and our host (mother). While that physical separateness is necessary, we are still connected emotionally and spiritually. This is the great paradox, how can we be  separate and connected at the same time? We must be separate to honor our uniqueness but loved, to nurture our growth. Being loved unconditionally resolves the paradox, in fact it is the only resolution possible. The wound is always a wound of being disapproved of by the love source that we value. The irony is that as we come to love our selves unconditionally, we invite others to love us, not to complete us but to add upon the love that is already there. We must overcome the disapproval virus that has infected us, the irony of this is that we must let others disapprove of us without being defined by it. That requires a deep spiritual love of self, knowing we are truly a child of God. This is the knowledge of the heart.

Please know my dear you are loved and loving.

My Thoughts About:

Enthusiasm 
Enthusiasm comes from the Greek enthousianmor, to infuse a divine spirit.
When one is enthused one see the world through new eyes. Eyes that may have been present for thousands of years-but are seen in fresh new dimensions. When one feels enthusiastic one feels connected to the world through mind, body and spirit. One sees what is possible through this connection and brings the dream into reality. Enthusiasm is contagious-it spreads from one entity to another until all feel the energy. It is an infusion of the divine spirit of all the creations because all creations are divine.

Play

Play is that part if us that balances out the functions of work. While it is no more joyous than work, it restores us to balance. It allows us the miracle of keeping the wonder-child alive in us. Play is often the reward for doing some arduous task. It is the function that keeps us connected to the joyful side of life. It allows us to forget our pain for a time and lets us know that pain can be transcended. Play allows us the freedom to be spontaneous, to laugh and to allow the foolish side of us to be. Play is as necessary as work-while work is productive-play is the reward offered to those who produce.

Tenderness

Tenderness is that quality that connects us the fragileness’ of life. When we understand that all life is sacred then there is nothing in this life that does not matter. All thought, feelings and behaviors matter. When we are tender we realize this connection is the source of all joy and happiness. When we are tender we realize our vulnerability and it is through this vulnerability that we are able to receive and to give our full measure of love. We are all like the young tender plant, strong enough to push through the concrete yet fragile enough to be crushed between two fingers. Tender touch reminds us of our divine nature and the connection we have to all living things.

 

Strength

Strength is that quality that enables us to do the right thing at the right time. It does not always relate to physical abilities. It more often relates to the knowledge of who you are and how you relate to the world around you. Strength comes from being emotionally connected to your self so that you live your truth when others are relying on external realities for the meaning placed on any given event. Strength has an enduring quality about it, it stands the test of time. Strength is that quality that allows one to live one’s truth under all circumstances. Strength does not mean that ego needs are put first but it does recognize that one has needs and these needs are taken into account when making difficult decisions, along with all others. Strength recognizes that unity and harmony are cords that bind us all. True strength comes from the ability to love unconditionally and that love is the only legitimate power in the universe.

Healing vs. Curing

September 16, 2012 Sunday

Some twenty five years ago a young woman was referred to me because she was “depressed.” That was the reason given by the referring physician. She also had an inoperable malignant brain tumor. This young lady had just gotten married and was starting a new chapter in her life. As I worked with her I witnessed such grace and dignity as she faced one challenge after another. She eventually came to accept the inevitable and had a transcendent peace within her. Her husband however, never was able to accept her inevitable death. As you may imagine his world of hopes and dreams were shattered by her diagnosis and prognosis. After science failed her he wanted to try everything possible. With each new rumor of a miracle cure he latched onto it and wanted her to try it. She was calm and resigned, he wasn’t. Much like him, I did not want to admit that death was inevitable even though in my heart I knew it to be so. I was seeing death as failure. That perception kept me from being present. Her husband’s grief and anxiety kept him from being present. In the end, I think we both failed her. 

I have come from that time to understand that being present is very much part of the healing process. Life is sacred and most people do not want to die, but death comes to us all and we have not failed because we die. Failure may be that while alive we really never lived.

This young woman and many since have taught me that when one finds a chosen purpose and meaning for life and is in alignment with the soul’s purpose, one has a transcendent joy. Healing truly transcends curing.

Our mortality brings us face to face with our own vulnerability. As we accept our vulnerability we are able to love more, see more, and be more present for self and others. Vulnerability allows us to love without condition and to accept love as it is given. I believe as we surrender we allow the angels to support us through every experience of mortality.  

Militant Healing

Why militant? 

The word is usually associated with military, violence, and domination of a person, group or territory by someone or a group that is committed to a particular cause. Militant implies commitment to a cause that usually is bigger than the individual or group. The word militant has come to have a negative connotation because of what is happening in the world today. The news is full of examples where one group is attempting to make a point with its militancy.  People are willing to die for a cause that is bigger than them. In my upcoming book (and through this blog), I am going to encourage people to bring that same kind of passion and commitment to a healing cause.  That cause is to heal their lives physically, emotionally and spiritually.